Tales of Poo
Never in my life did I imagine handling someone else’s feces. Not that many sit around imagining stuff like this (hee hee). This is the nasty side of Mommyhood.
When they are little, they have little baby poops. They are squishy, not too smelly, and you pretty much know what to expect.
Now that Poopy is older, her shits vary day to day. Sometimes they are logs – like big person logs. Sometimes squishy, sometimes runny. ALWAYS STANKY. Seriously. My kids shit reeks. Like her Daddys. And when she eats corn…………..man.
We’ve had a few poop incidents lately. Thought I’d share.
A few weeks ago, Poops was in the bath. There was a shart. At the time, we didn’t realize it was a shart. We thought it was a regular ole fart (that girl can lay them down!). Then, we hear, “oooooh, ooooh” and see that Poops is grabbing for something. Apparently, a little something slipped out and she was going to play with it. Just thinking about her chubby little hand reaching for the small poop is making me sick.
One night, we decided to go swimming. Poops was out of swimming pampers, so we just put her bathing suit on her. Sure enough, she took a dump. It was hilarious. She was walking around with a load in her little bikini. Abel handled that one.
One weekend, we had my sister and brother in law over for steaks. Poops was taking a nap. She had fallen asleep in only her pamper. I peeked in to check on her and noticed that she had taken the pamper partially off. A little while later, she started to wake up. My sister volunteered to go get her. She went in there and called me in. Apparently Poops had shit in her crib and was trying to crawl out of it, like the poop was going to get her. I hear that babies sometimes play in their poop, smear it all over the walls and such. Mine’s afraid of hers. As well she should be – this turd was at least as big as her forearm. It was a monster. I have no idea how it came out of her little butt. Abel handled that one too.
I’m not really good with the poop part. It totally grosses me out. Which is pretty immature of me. Can’t help it though. I mean, I barely tolerate wiping my own ass.