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Decisions, Decisions

July 20, 2006

As a new Mom, there are a lot of decisions you have to make. Should you bottle feed or breast feed? Should you CIO? Should you Co-Sleep? What kind of parent are you going to be? AP/NP? When should you introduce solids? Wean off the bottle? Should you use a paci?

There are a lot of things to take into consideration. I said before that I don’t research. Some people take that as ignorance. So be it. You have your way and I have mine.

I don’t consider my parenting any “style”. I created my own phrase for it “Parenting By Instinct”. I do what feels right to me. I figure God gave me what I needed to raise children and I’d use it. It’s a lot cheaper than buying books too!

I chose not to breastfeed. It’s a very personal choice and one I didn’t like to be asked about. It’s so weird to me that people, perfect strangers ask you about this. The checker at the grocery store sees you with a new baby and thinks they have the right to ask if you breastfeed. As if that’s not enough, people have the gall to ask you why not? It’s rude and personal. I don’t ask what you did with your breasts this morning, don’t ask what I did with mine. I think, if you choose to breastfeed, good for you. I didn’t, good for me. Because this is my blog, I’ll give the reason why I didn’t. The plain, simple truth is, I didn’t want to. Period. End of story for me. I wanted my body back (see, told you I was selfish!). Most babies lose an ounce or two before leaving the hospital. Not my hoss – she was her birth weight when we left. Had I chosen to breastfeed, I would have had to pump and discard the first 4 days of her life because of the gallbladder surgery. That’s a lot of work. I’m lazy as well as selfish apparently. I want to make it clear that I didn’t choose formula feeding because I see my breasts as sexual and it didn’t feel right to me. That’s not it at all. With the pressure from society, after all this time I’m still defending my choice. I don’t think that’s right, but unfortunately that’s the way it is.

We opted not to co-sleep. I just wasn’t comfortable with it and honestly didn’t know enough about it. When I was 8 months pregnant or so, a friend told me about an 8 week old baby who died the first night her parents brought her to bed with them. Totally freaked me out. I was too afraid I’d roll over on her and kill her. I still don’t think I’d do it now, even knowing what I know. It’s just not the right decision for us. To me, our bed is for our time. We go to bed together, watch TV, talk, etc. It’s our place as a couple. On Saturday mornings, I’m all for it being our place as a family.

We didn’t CIO. We do let her fuss occasionally, but it never reached the point we needed to try to CIO. I don’t judge those that do. I’m not in their position, I don’t have their child. I think for some, it’s the right answer, it’s not for everyone.

We introduced solids at 4 months. Our ped said she felt she was ready. When we tried, I felt like she wasn’t and we waited until she was 6 months. She wasn’t on baby food long. We just started feeding her table food, whatever we were eating and that was the end of the pureed crap in a bottle. I try my hardest to make sure she’s eating healthy, well balanced meals. Yes, she eats crap too! She’s a kid, she’s allowed to eat crap, have fun. It’s funny though, she prefers fruit over anything else.

We didn’t have to deal with weaning off the bottle. One day she simply didn’t want it and that was the end of it.

We did and still do use a paci. It’s a sleep only thing. When it’s nap time, or night-night time, she gets her paci. If it’s still in her mouth when she wakes up, I ask her to take it out and she does. I don’t feel an immediate need for her to stop anytime soon. When she’s ready, she won’t take it anymore.

I can say with total honesty that I do what I feel is best for my child all day, every day. I must be doing something right. She’s happy, healthy, well-adjusted, smart. I never let anyone make me feel guilty about my decisions. I sleep just fine at night.

2 Comments leave one →
  1. Andrea permalink
    July 22, 2006 6:21 pm

    Amen! I feel the same way.

  2. Anonymous permalink
    August 10, 2006 8:53 am

    Your are Excellent. And so is your site! Keep up the good work. Bookmarked.

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